Spent most of the day in bed...it was the kind of day where you think about the decisions you make and how they could affect you and the ones you love...lots of tears and reflection and hopefully a day of healing as well...
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6 comments:
I don't want anyone to worry...nothing too dramatic has happened. I just think a lot of things came to a head this trip home.
To say that being away from my family is hard is an understatement. To admit that sometimes I enjoy this new freedom makes me feel horrible and guilty.
My mother dying adds a new dimension to my soul and I sometimes find myself floundering emotionally with the impact of it.
And even though getting orders home is the best thing for me and my family, it leaves me feeling like a failure. I will probably not get promoted because of this transfer and that is not exactly the way I wanted to end this blessed career.
This is just some of my thoughts tonight - thanks for listening.
Honey, you have gone further than any of of could have ever imagined for ourselves....
you have gave yourself to our country completely, and in the same sentence have had to sacrifice your family... your life, your love....
yes, you can feel guilty, it's taking away from your journey as a military personnel....
but look forward, as to what you will not miss as a mom..... your little ones especially thrive on your smile at them...and just being there.... we are all learning...
you cannot get anything, and you cannot take anything from what you missed from your mom.... you can think about the good things... and the bad things.. .and just understand that it was the cards dealt to your life.... and learn from it...
we are ALL here for you....
:) Hoping for a healing evening...
Love you sis....
Marci,
Thank you. I love you, too.
LeighAnn... I dont think there is a thing of value I could add to what Marci has said. She summed it up beautifully.
You have given to all... and asked very little for you. Failure?!? NEVER! Look at your beautiful family! Your wonderful friends! You, my special friend, are truly the picture of success. Through everything... you think of others... I want to be YOU when I grow up!
I love you and miss you!!
Tina
Such beautiful women with beautiful words :)
I'm not in your shoes...but I do think the job you have as a mother and active duty military is the hardest job out there...then you factor in your mom, and Paul's mom and Paul's health and you have a major overload..
Sure, not getting that promotion is gonna hurt...but in time it will be more gentle on your heart...unlike the hurt of not being with the family who all need you...and you need them..that doesn't become more gentle ...and you know all this :)
Lots of love and peace, my dear friend!!
Well the word FAILURE has never come to mind when thinking of you ... I have told you often how proud I am of your career choice, your girls are amazing and that is a reflection of you, and you have made my brother so happy as both his wife and his best friend!!!
I am glad you took the time to reflect because it is healing and being honest w/yourself is a must ... I just love ya bunches and think you are perfect for my brother, a mother whose daughters adore her, and a great friend !!! That all sounds like SUCCESS to me ...
LOVE YA SISTER ...
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